BABY!!!

gosh. i'm so sorry to leave you halfway. it was a reali BREAKDOWN for me abt tis.

THANKS FOR BEING MY COCK PARTNER!

bi natter how busy we are leading our OWN LIFE, i WON'T forget you.

COS YOU R MY ONLY BABY!

nobody cud ever replace your place.

our f/s reali MEAN SO MUCH TO ME!

THANKS A MILLION CILLION ZILLION && INFINITIES!!!

=D

ILY ALWAYS MY One & ONLY BABY!!

p/s i still rmrbr the first time how we suddenly be close with each other. =]

I'm REALI ThANKFUL for having a fren lyk you...

DON'T FORGET &&&& LEAVE ME!! =[

yest was FUCKING day for me.

i tot tt day wud b a better day. i went to leisure park to apply for full time since my best niece was working thr. aftr i wanna head to work at USS. den my bro was begging me to company him go dentist. my pitiness for him came & thr i go. it was quite fast. check my FB & randomly i get msg from sum1. talking abt the past. DAMN. i wish i wasn't being reminded of my past. i was pissed off *kinda*. den cooled myself down.

At nyte, was otp w him. GOSSHH!! *cried silently* cos my heart was pumping so fast. which idky. tdy plan i tag him den he raise his tone abt his at event. & he said was lyk 'k la,you tc of yrself' w tt tone. wat sia.... when i told him, he raised his voice. HU HE TINK I AM!!! A HEARTLESS HUMAN?? WHY NOWDAYS YOU'RE CARE WASN"T THE SAME! YOU NOE HOW HURT IT IS! CRY SILENTLY! KEEPING IT ALL TO MYSELF? FEELS LYKE I'M STABBING MY OWN HEART! you told me tt you felt we r falling apart, have you FIGURE it OUT WHY?? YOU WOULD NEVER UNDERSTAND ME! NEVER! you've! CHANGED *grrr* feel lyk SOL.

*i've just miss my old boifie. =[*

NOBODY CARES! NOBODY KNOWS! that DEEP INSIDE you're HURTING. NOBODY KNOW HOW PAIN it is. CRIES everynight HOPING SOMEONE could LET you EXPRESS it OUT.

EVEN your loved ONE won't CARE, 'CRY wasn't a GUYS THING!' when you said you need someone SOO BADLY. just to lend his shoulder to CRY to & FEEL WITH.

Your FRIEND, won't FIND YOU UNLESS THERE's SOMETHING you OWES THEM!

I wouldn't be SHOCK if you play behind my back. I wouldn't be SHOCK if our LOVE FADING. I wouldn't be SHOCK if we are to go separate ways.

I would ONLY wonder HOW AM I GOING TO COPE WITH MY LIFE IN FUTURE w/O YOU!..

the FEELING WOULDN'T be NICE if you're STANDING on your OWN when you FALL.

*you make my LIFE feel so ALIVE*

!!ALL THE BEST TO ME for my UPCOMING LIFE!!

this few days wasn't tat gud for me. didn't have time to update my blog & finally have sum tymes. be at hm due to sum reason. finally, can rest for few days den back to my usual routines.

Lovee, why you didn't have or make sumtymes for me when i reali nid you. i noe i didn't showed it to you. but initiave darlx. i reali nid you to b by myside so badly. i nid a shoulder to cry on & a person tat feel me. i reali miss the old sweet times we gone through. we waited each other even wateva it takes & dark falls. the other half of me trying to go back to old days but the other told me not to. cos the consequences i get from you will reali breakdown for me & i noe i cudn't reali move on. when wud tis fate end? when cud my miserably life end? when is the time i cud b happy as b4? being w you? when? when?

GERLFRIENDS. thks for stand by me. thks for helping me & hearing me even if you hate hearing it. i noe, there are obstacles happening. but especialy to you baby, you didn't change. Dun listen to others cos they envy you  for having more then 3 gfs. to the one tat i kol bebs, you've lied, you've changed & you left me. i dun noe e reason y & i dun wish to noe y. cos my dearest baobei (serene,weiting,xuan hui & yi jing) are always thr weneva i nid dem.

NOBODY CAN REPLACE DEM! NOBODY!

Fri, went out wif lovee to ecp. camping 2gether. kinda say have fun oso but not tt lots. ermm... dun wish to tok abt it.actuali ryte,I LAZY TO UPDATE!!!!! hahahaha...nvm.my life goes on smoothly. but WERK make me SICK!! can i not go werk.......... haishh....weneva i work i MISS THE FUN i had w my Gerlfiee..'You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you do not trust enough.'this sentence make me realise. shud i or shud i not. goshh. but love took over everything. it overtake TRUST.. HOW!!!??aniway reali had much fun w serene, xuan hui & yi jing.. dey noe i noe.. hahahahaha...aniway AH LI!!! THANKKSS!!!

SLEEPY!! SLEEPY!!!

haha..

tis few days things went sooo not in my mood. (hope you peeps understand) mayb i shud listen to others.

k lovee, i promise. i think its time to let it all go. i wun du it again. gettg myself in trouble. make others look down on me. now i noe wat a person i am. thx FREN FREN. haha.

gosshh. nowdays past so fast. i can't imagine tt now i cud wait for you. unlike last time. Our love bcome STRONG. ppl envy us, follow us but i noe they wudn't bcome us even if they tried.

Thanks to my fren tt be w me through wateva. ILYG!

x ReNeyy BaBy

x Xuan BaNaNa =D

x Wei Ting TING =P

x Yi JinG

wahh they make me realise how important i am ESPECIALLY SERENE BABY!!

FUCK THOSE SLUTS.

THE DORKIES ON THEIR WAY!!!!!!

can't wait to mit lovee tmr. hope money wasn't our issue. & hope tt we enjoy this days 2gether b4 you book in again k syg? syg DIDY!!!!

It's been days, bz w life, love ones & frens. life was suck! arguments EVERYDAY! nobody listen till i've done. NOBODY undstd it ALL!!! reali hoping tmr & aftr was a new day for me.

....I HATE YOU BUT I LOVE YOU....

maybe the time has come. i dunnoe loving you to my fullest is the time yet or it's to fast. its hard to LET YOU GO. one day if i let you go, you should noe y.

Where are you when i need sum1 to tok to? listen to my prob every sgl tings. eventhough i cudn't have yr shoulder to cry on. i would b satisfy if you cud hear me, feel me. what do you do when i nid sum1 to entertain me? when i cud not sleep or bored. what do you do after you shout at me? eventhough i shpw my tantrum.

I really miss the old times we had. if i cud turn back i would. sometimes i wish i could move on w/o you. you dun noe how hurt it is to bear tis pain. if oni you cud see i cried out loud. hear me shout out loud. you wud noe it all.

i wanna spend the tyme we've lost together. i wanna catch it all. but i can't do it all alone.

you call me psycho b4 cos you understand it all. the memories, ppl wun understand.......

yest was GREAT DAY!!! meet up w dem. camwhore w dem. miss the moments seii!! eventhough hairah came late but still we du a little catch up. hahaha.. GIRLS, IMY! hahahaha.. goosshh.. wander wen our next meeting,, =]]

LOVE, tmr is the day for your another book out. but it seems tat it didn't happen. IT WAS A FUCKING DISASTER NEWS FOR ME!!! wht.. 1 mth?? w/o seeing you? gossh i wanna CRY!! you can lie to me. but not to yourself. you may tink i'm stupid but I'M NOT!  yest had small arguments. idk. i tried to love you less but the TRIED seem FAILED. OMG. tis feeling is hurting me. i hope. tis will get better. hope soo.... Is tis wat i'm asking for.. when he told day i was lyk saying NNNOOOO!!! guess i gotta b strong. C'mon huda, stand up. face the fact. face th world on yr own. BE STRONG!!!!!

LOVE, pls dun get me wrong. wateva you said yest reali make me silent for a moment. it's not tt i'm AVOIDING you. lyk wat i say b4 the more i TRY TO HATE you i realise tt I LOVE YOU even more. i didn't noe wat else to do. contactg you was difficult since the day you lost yr hp. it's difficult for me. wat i'm gg through now. i reali wish i cud share w you everiting. let it all out. i reali du pity her, the 1 tt been w me w/o failed. telling her the truth wud make her breakdown even more. i cnt bear to let her down deep inside. i just wish we cud b lyk b4 or way better den it is now.

as for my sch, i realise everytg change till tis gerl came in2 my lyf. my laziness all i put behind. she give me strenght to face wateva in sch. she's reali a fren to me tt i nvr have. i reali appreciate it baby. lotsa. w/o you i tink i'm still e old me. LAZY gerl.. =]]

Yest training for RWS was SUPERB!!! can't wait to start officially werking. SOOO CCOOLL!!! holiday or honeymoon WANNA GO THERE!! aarrgghh.. LOLS. i've get posted to Egyptian place. -.-' OASIS. make few fwens yest. i even make new fwen w a gerl tt has a SAME NAME W me. cool kn? only different father name. hahaha. but she's older. hurhur.. haisshh.. didn't wanna tell aniimore wat happen after tt. makes me AARRRGGHH!!!!! S.O.L!

specially for YOU:

where are you when i nid you the most? to cry on your shoulder,to share e happy tings tt i went through for the day && to talk to? tings reali du change not bit but LOTSA. i reali miss those moments. we've been going alot thick & thins but sumtyms i realise i cud not take it aniimore. the more i tink abt tis the more hurt it is. yes, you make me smile w/o failed but there's a limit. i noe you didn't ask for it i understand. When i'm HATING YOU i realise the MORE THAT I LOVE YOU! wen cud tis end? i couldn't bear the pain. holding on to myself strongly. getting up alone slowly eventhough it hurt most. sumtyms i du wander to shud i walk out or not. It's feels tt my heart full of pain but i dun noe y trying to find the ans till now...

 remember wateva happens. no matter whatever happens in e future you'll always be in my heart. 

p/s: pls dun get me wrong. i'm posting tis not bcos to hurt you but wat came from deep within. =]]